Hallelujah

I was driving to work this morning with Christmas music in the CD player and the Hallelujah Chorus started and I was trying to sing along (but I can't sing that high), so instead I sat back and took a second to realize this amazing song is triumphantly about praise and for that reason it demands that you stand when it is played or sung. It's about my Jesus. King of Kings and Lord of Lords Forever and Ever Hallelujah Hallelujah. A tear came to my eye.

Which was so welcome because how easily service for Him replaces intimacy with Him. I get so busy doing this and that, that I forget to just sit at His feet and choose the better thing that Mary chose. Sometimes it's ok to be Mary. Martha works too hard. She did good, but Mary did what was better. I'm definitely Martha. I want to be Mary. How easy that sounds!

The Plunge

So I took the plunge today into the wonderful world of orthodontics. I got braces put on, a retainer looking thingy on the bottom, and funny little blue rings between my back teeth. All the pain and embarrasment is for the sole purpose of having a gorgeous smile one of these days. Ah, the things we go through. I'm both nervous and excited about this adventure. That's what I'm calling it...an adventure. And so goes Day 1. I'm hungry. Eating is a chore. I'm talking funny. Ss's are hard. The best part, however, is that everyone is super supportive and excited for me. Most things in life I suppose are made better and easier because of the people around us who both cheer us on and warn us gently.

I'm going home now...to try to eat something. Wish me luck.

By the way...those aren't my teeth. Nor is that my upper jaw. Nor is that half my mouth sitting on the counter. But that IS what type of braces I have on the tops there.

Switchfoot

Laughter doesn't come as easily as it once did. I hate that. I suppose it makes you truly appreciate when it does come. The shadow proves the sunshine, right?

My frustration for the day is quite simply this: what do you do when in your brain, love equals action, but there's no possible action for the love you feel? When you want to love someone (and I'm not talking like lovey love...but simply the type of love we're called to) but you can't show it. They don't want you to. There's nothing you can do that's right. You're at the end of you. You have to let it go and let Him love instead. Because His love can reach even the most stubborn. His love is perfect. Ours isn't. Mine isn't. He sees and knows things and people completely. We trust that because that's all we can do.

Daisy let it go. Open up your fist. This fallen world doesn't hold your interest. Doesn't hold your soul.

My goal for tonight

Last season I watched LOST every Wednesday night. I was hooked! The mystery of the island, how their lives intertwined before the plane, how they were all connected and on the island "for a reason". It's brilliant! I was so excited for this season to begin, that I've celebrated by not remembering to watch it. It's been on three weeks in a row, and three weeks in a row I've completely forgotten to watch it or tape it. I get hasseled (sp?) every Thursday by ladies at work who are terribly disappointed in my inability to do a simple task...like remember to tape a television show. So my goal for tonight is to go home and set my VCR to tape LOST that is on ABC at 8pm. If I do not do this tonight, my life will be over. I will hang my head in shame all the rest of the days of my life.

Circle of Life

so my dad's uncle, uncle dave, uncle dave who would bring a bag of home grown apples from his tree and leave them on our front porch every fall, has passed away. dad and louis both get to be pallbearers. rosary, mass, funeral...it's the whole shabang. He had stomach cancer...ate him alive I guess. Cancer. It's such an ugly word for such an ugly thing. Funny how that works out. I guess when they went to his house to start cleaning stuff out, there was a message on his answering machine from my grandpa...telling him goodbye. I think old people have this inner sense of when they are leaving. They know. Deep down somewhere, they know when it's gonna happen. Kinda makes me want to cry. I don't want to be old like that.

Hello World

I decided recently that this might be fun. To take all those thoughts that run through my head daily and write them down somewhere so that others can see them. I'm not scared. Not at all. I trust you. I will pretend for a moment that you will actually come and see them and comment on them to let me know I'm not alone in thinking them. Even if you don't, it's ok. Sometimes it takes writing things down in order to fully collect them and analyze them and respond to them. Here it goes.